Letters to Evie

So back in October I started this blog because I thought maybe new parents might come across it and be like boy we are going through the same ups and downs and we don't know anything about babies. But hey at least we aren't alone. 
Now the focus has shifted to I don't know what, just trying to stay strong for Evie, I guess. I know that many other parents have gone through this pain of having their child ripped away. And from what I hear it happens a lot.One of my friends at the spa told me about how her brother had to fight for years just to see his girl. Come to find out now that the kid is older she wants nothing to do with her own mom because her mom used her as a pawn. So I guess through my ups and downs I can give hope to those people. Hope that hey I am still here and alive. An know matter what I am still Evie's mom.

So now I am going to start letters to Evie. And someday when she asks questions I will show her how much I care and love her.I hope that these letters can inspire other parents out there and perhaps, through fate, someone who needs some hope will find this blog.

Dear Evie,
This morning I didn't want to wake up. I stayed up all last night watching shows and snuggled on the couch without you. This is when I miss you the most. Do you remember when you were so tiny and we used to snuggle on the couch and fall asleep together? Your little baby snores were so cute! I just saw you at the mall yesterday and I already miss you. I can't wait to see you again and play with your new rocking horse. You love chewing on that horse, lol. You are one very lucky girl to have such a nice grandma to buy you stuff and take you shopping. She loves you very much and takes great care of you. And I know your little bathing suit will look great on you.I hope you and your dad have a great day.
Mommy